[open] Newt Geiszler

[completelycrazy]

Comments

for bickeringscience

[completelycrazy]

[goddamn captcha.]

[bickeringscience]

Newton, if you’re nowhere near the ocean, you aren’t near the Shatterdome...Are you lost? Do you need me to come get you? World saving potential aside, I would very much like you to be safe for your own sake. I also don’t feel like having to put up with a new lab partner.

I’m not sure how. Either way, I would have somehow ended up as your caretaker. You may have been able to make it back more quickly with my aid, but your badge would have still been lost.

[completelycrazy]

Jeez calm down I'm like near the ocean in a general sense but not close enough to take a dive off the dock or something. I'm not lost!
Just stay at the Shatterdome it's raining again. You don't need to be out in this.
But color me shocked that you consider me in the upper percentile of lab partners. With all those HR complaints you've filed against me I'd have thought for sure you'd rather risk your luck on a reroll.
No dude like I'd pay actual money to see you plastered. In fact that's an offer. Come out with me next time. I'll buy.
I'll even hold your hair back when you're inevitably horking in some alley.

[bickeringscience]

I’m going against my better judgement, and I’m choosing to trust that should you need more help from me, you’ll ask for it.

I’ve dealt with much more insufferable people.

[ Give him a minute or two for the remainder of his response. It actually requires weighing some pros and cons, and then, ultimately, an exasperated ‘fine’ that he actually says out loud. ]

I am not going to be “horking in some alley”, but I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to have one night out.

[completelycrazy]

A risky move buddy. I wont let you down. Probably anyway idk the night is young.
Okay I think I see the Shatterdome lights so be there in like uhhh lets call it ten. Fifteen maybe. While I'm in the last leg here solve a mystery for me. On a scale of 1 to 10 how insufferable am I? Lol.
Omg seriously? Hell yes Hermann! We'll see about the horking though I'm gonna make you drink a car bomb.

[icly plans for future threads, honestly.]

[bickeringscience]

Please don’t make me immediately regret this decision. I’ll head towards the entrance in about ten minutes. If I don’t see you by twenty, I’ll assume that you’ve done something stupid. At the moment, you’re an eight. Make it back, and I’ll consider knocking it down to a seven.

Don’t push it, Newton.

[ the thought of hermann doing an irish car bomb gives me so much delight??? ]

1/2

[completelycrazy]

I have 6 phds Hermann I am incapable of stupidity.
Fine I'll text you when I'm close.

[And then he presumably finds something better to occupy his time on the walk over because it's radio silence...]

for edelweisse

[completelycrazy]

[captcha sux.]

OH. Well damn my apologies.
I'm like uhhh I lost track of how many shots in okay I can't be held accountable for my assumptions.
Anyway both? Both is good. Keeping our options open and all.

MY HERO

[edelweisse]

[completelycrazy]

kely thats not a tag

listen i got so excited i hit enter and then you replied when i tried to edit so 2/2

[edelweisse]

[RUDE.]

If you're inebriated to such an extent perhaps I should simply forgo the emergency rations and provide a hangover cure all instead.

I'M LOSING MY MIND

[completelycrazy]

No!!! I'm gonna DIE!
Is the hangover cure all that awesome coffee you make though? I'll absolutely take some of that if you're offering.

GOOD!!!

[edelweisse]

[Praise me. Praise me!!]

Just as a test of your judgement and responsiveness while under the influence how exactly would one get from your laboratory to your current location?

[This is absolutely not because she has no sense of direction. No.]

captcha sux

[venomosity]

( cont. )

To be fair, you were just asking to get murdered.
Make up your mind, Newt.

[completelycrazy]

Lol.
Okay fair but I mean like in a fun way? Spiritually not literally.

[venomosity]

But literal murder IS fun for me.

[ if he needed any reminder that he's hookin up with a convicted killer . . . ]

[completelycrazy]

.../Okay/ but would you rather kill me or fuck me?
These things are mutually exclusive. Sorry to rain on your parade I guess?

[venomosity]

Don't underestimate what a Conductor is capable of. :)

[ she waits a minute ]

Just kidding. I'd hate to lose our Reapers with benefits arrangement.

[completelycrazy]

Wait are you saying you could kill me and then like undo it?

[originallutece]

Do you have alcohol, Newt? Not a little. A lot. Enough for us both to get drunk for several days; that's the amount I'm speaking of. If not, buy us some, please.

Actually: whatever amount you're thinking of, double it. I want to be drunk for at least a week. You can get a tattoo. We'll have sex in a bounce house. That's what society does nowadays, I suppose, just debauches themselves until they're useless; we might as well go with the times.

[completelycrazy]

[Ah. Well then.]

What happened and which one of them did it?

[originallutece]

Jesse. Harlan wouldn't pull this kind of stunt.

And he's currently hosting an orgy, as I found out when I opened the door and just saw a mass of writhing bodies. An orgy, Newt. Not just a threesome, not some sort of ordinary escapade, no. At least twenty-five, if not more.

An ORGY.

In MY HOUSE.

I have OAKEN FLOORS, Newton.

[completelycrazy]

Holy crap. He went and pulled a Peter on you, huh?

I sympathize with your distress but you have to admit, it's impressive. He's taking to the vampire lifestyle, if not in the way you'd hoped he would.

Are they in a bounce house? Is that where you got the idea?

[originallutece]

There's a bounce house out back that's shaking ominously.

And I will not admit anything. It's not impressive, it's ridiculous, Harlan never pulled this. Not everyone goes around having orgies. I don't. You . . . haven't recently, I assume.

[completelycrazy]

Oh, wow. Points for creativity.

Harlan put you through the ringer too, just in different ways. You DO remember his primary hobby is murdering people for sport right? Some people might argue it's weird to be more upset about the bounce house orgy than like, serial killing. 🤷‍♂️

Anyway no. Exotic as Jesse's exploits sound, they're not my scene.

Would you be mad if I slept around one on one though?

[He hasn't—or, at least, he hasn't had any encounters that she doesn't already know about. But, well. It's a question worth asking. :)]